When we are children we tend to be more focused and connected to our ideas and aspirations. We have no idea how we are going to make them happen, but we believe anything can happen and that anything is possible.
Think about how many times people asked you, when you were younger what do you want to be when you grew up? They wanted you to give yourself a title and if it wasn’t the title that they were connected with or possibly thought you would make good enough money doing, then they would try to talk you out of it, or just yes you and say, “Oh, you are such a dreamer.” Well, maybe you are or maybe even at a young age you were just truly connected to who you wanted to be. Who says you cannot achieve all that you want in life? Who makes the rules?
Fast forward years later you have a career, you are now married with kids, you have a core group of friends you rarely meet up with because you are so busy, you have pets, and own a house. Now you have a ton of titles from mother or father to employee, or employer, to cook, cleaner, chauffeur, etc. Our connection to our aspirations and ideas may no longer be in the forefront of our minds. As, the titles pile up and the responsibility piles on we are now buried under all of it and are the farthest we have ever been with connecting to our true authentic self.
I asked someone the other day after over 20 years in a career that she enjoyed, “Who are you? What do you want in the next chapter of your life?” It is kind of funny because now the question at this point is who are you now that you are all grown up? That does not only mean in your career, that means in life in general. She looked at me and said, “I don’t know.” Her words, “I have been in the same industry for a good part of my life. I raised my son and I grew within the organization I worked in. I cooked dinners, I made beds, I took my son to school and went to all his games and now that he is graduating high school, I won’t be doing most of those things anymore. I am stuck thinking who am I? Where do I go from here? I feel lost.” Of course, that is the start of empty nest syndrome. However, my point is you don’t have to wait until your kids grow up or any other reason to give yourself permission to connect internally with who you are and allow yourself to go after the things you want in your life. You are allowed at any age to have hopes, dreams, aspirations and more importantly to take the steps necessary to go after them. So many of my clients are those who are unsure about what their passion even is and what they are interested in doing in the next phase of their life. They actually feel guilty if they allow themselves at this stage of their life to focus on themselves because they have so much responsibility.
In a coaching session we start by going back to the basics of learning how to listen and give yourself permission to listen to your inner voice. In essence, re-connect with yourself. The answers are in there. They are just like buried treasure. This time it’s because fear is playing a role, time management issues are playing a role, and quite possibly our logical brain is telling us we can’t and shouldn’t. Two words I tell everyone to take totally out of their vocabulary because neither leaves you with a positive feeling after you say them to anyone or to yourself.
I recently worked with a client who has two kids and a full time job. Her dream was to become an interior designer and she started school, but couldn’t find the time anymore to get the work done. When we met her first words were, “I can’t do it. I want to get my degree, but I have no time to fit it in.” She was feeling frustrated and disappointed in the fact that she was struggling. We went through some exercises to find out if that was, in fact really what she was passionate about. She worked on reconnecting to the passion of when she first started to go back to school and fast forward only a few short months later she has her degree and now she has her own business. She is truly ready to go into the next phase of her career. She could have continued to tell herself she has no time and that it didn’t really matter anyway, but instead she believed that she deserved the opportunity to reconnect with herself. By reconnecting in one aspect of your life it helps you in other aspects of your life.
So, who are you now that you are all grown up? Anything is possible!
For more information about Connection Coaching please email Jodi at jodi@todayisthedayliveit.com.
Today is the Day! Live it!
Jodi
Today is the Day 